Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Why Speak in 3rd person?

indreamsshecame recently commented that she had “never met someone who speaks in 3rd person. you mention that it is important to you, and if you would be so kind, i would appreciate learning more about why it feels right for you.”

deidre realized that while she addressed the question of how and when she learned to do so here she’s never exactly explained the purpose behind it.

First of all, and this isn’t directed toward any person in particular, deidre would like to say that there is quite a bit of negativity in certain communities toward those who are allowed to speak this way. It seems to stem from the mistaken assumption that those who do so are “only online slaves” Regardless of how the person serves (internet, phone, cam, weekend, evening or 24/7) this girl assumes that they still give the same amount of devotion. Saying that those who serve or control online or only part time are not real or are somehow less than others is just as ludicrous as saying that submissives are something less than slaves because they don’t submit fully. It’s not true. Each holds a different level of submission or dominance according to what meets the needs of the person. It doesn’t make them less real. The only thing that would make a person something less in this girl’s mind is if they chose not to express this particular parts of themselves as fully as possible.

Now, onto the actual question. Why speak in 3rd person?

kaya_s said it very well recently here when she said Third person speech in the context of a Master/slave relationship is a psychological technique designed to erase, or neutralize the sense of "I". Speaking in third creates detachment of self and as the gap between the 'I' and the 'me' deepens, the slave is forced into the position of pure object and loses his or her sense of interiority, intimacy, and privacy. The denial of these pronouns is the removal of ego.

Not only does it erase the sense of “I” and remove the focus from self but it is also a way for an Owner to take even more control. In deidre’s situation not only does He control what she wears, what and when she eats, where and when she shits, pisses, sleeps, sometimes even her breath but her speech as well. Every time she refers to herself she uses the name He gave her (deidre), or refers to her status as His (Master’s slave, Your bitch etc). The idea is that nothing is done with Him being the first thought in her mind.