Master's Return

OK, so now that you’ve read it from the perspective of deidre’s pussy, here’s the rest of how Master’s first night back was.

The day before Master had instructed her to prepare for Him in a special way. He left her clothing up to His slave’s judgement, but wanted her to bind her breasts tightly before she left to pick Him up at the airport.

His first flight out of LAX was delayed a bit so deidre had some extra time to prepare for Him. she wanted to do something special, something that He’d never see before, at least not with deidre. In the Florida Room/Work shop is a big roll of industrial clear plastic rap. deidre’s plan was to wear only plastic wrap and maybe her crotch belt and harness.

Have you ever tried to wrap yourself in plastic wrap? It’s not that easy. OMG deidre must’ve looked hilarious trying to roll around on the wrap that she had spread out over the bed. she wanted it to be tight around her waist and her breasts, just like a corset (sort of) Well, it didn’t work.

So she switched to Plan B. Daddy’s little girl. she hopped in the shower and washed her body with baby wash, dried off, parted her hair down the middle, braided it, put on her little pleated purple skirt, slid her white ruffly sox onto her feet and stepped into her mary janes. she did her make up, brushed her teeth, and all of that other boring stuff.

Finally it was almost time to leave. deidre got out some white rope from the bondage closet and started to wrap her tits tightly. she put her shirt on and realized that one doesn’t really end up with much cleavage peeking out of the neckline when their tits are tied, but even so she really liked how it looked.

she had to drive through the pick up area 3 times because the dumb narky guys wouldn’t let her just sit there and wait no matter how many times she batted her eyelashes prettily at them.

Finally, there He was. Master. Safe and in 1 piece after 2 whole weeks away from His pet. He even did His own laundry while He was away * gasp * Yeah, really. He put His stuff in the car and We/we drove home.

Evidently Master missed the pool more than deidre’s pussy so that’s where He went first, out for a swim. While He was out there A. called just to say "hi" Master came back in at the tail end of the conversation and they got to speak for the first time. Understandably A was nervous, but it all went well and they’ve talked several times since then. deidre finds herself getting more and more excited, but is trying to control it.

After they finished talking, Master told deidre to turn on the overhead lights over the dining room table. At some point her shirt had been removed so she was now only wearing her purple pleated skirt, her frilly socks, her mary janes and a nice little bit of rope tied tightly around her purple breasts.

He had her bend over the table pushing down on her swollen breasts (ouch) with her legs spread wide. deidre felt His hand against her cunt feeling for how wet she was. For a moment He stood there caressing her ass cheeks and as hard as deidre tried to fight it she began to cry. she was dreading the pain. she’d gone for 2 weeks without it and even though she was only to receive a spanking she was afraid of even that little bit of pain. she didn’t want Him to stop, she just felt that panic building up in her. Then He began. He started lightly and then built it up to the point where deidre’s tears were just beginning to catch in her eyelashes. Then He stopped and told her that she was a good girl.

Next He had her crawl on top of the table, lie down on her back, and spread her legs wide. He wanted to take a look at His slut’s cunt with the pretty little piercings. He liked them very much (pictures will be taken again once the camera returns from Canon fix it land). It felt a bit like some kind of gyno/interrogation fantasy. The lights were on full and burning into deidre’s eyes, she was spread wide open being poked and prodded with Master’s fingers. Then He told her to cum for Him. He wanted her to masturbate and cum several times, then He was going to take her into the bedroom.

deidre really enjoys the sound of her rings tinking against each other as she rubs her clit. Master’s fingers slid inside her, 2 in her hungry little pussy hole and 1 up inside her ass. He fucked her that way while she took herself through 3 wonderful orgasms. When He was finished with her He allowed her to lick her fingers clean and to suck her juices off of His as well. Then He led her into the bedroom for the real fun.

Of course, His cock was hard. It had been since deidre picked Him up at the airport, and deidre’s cunt was slobbering juice down her thighs. she was ready. He was ready. Together We/we got onto the bed and deidre sunk down onto His cock for the first time in forever. she rode Him slowly at first, savoring that feeling of fullness and the slow pressure of His cock head against her back wall. He had her adjust just a little into a position that didn’t irritate the rings. deidre looked a bit strange probably, riding Him in a weird little squat, but it felt so good. Hearing His soft manly moans and sharp intakes of breath was heaven as was telling Him how much she missed feeling Him inside.

Neither Master nor deidre came that way though, the position was just too awkward, but He did allow her to get down between His legs and suck more of her fuck juice off of Him before getting down to business and worshiping Him with her mouth. It didn’t take long before He was telling His little bitch to beg for His cum, and then shooting that wonderful load into her throat. she swallowed it all down and then was allowed to cuddle with Him, lying in His arms for a few minutes afterward.

deidre asked Him if He had missed His pussy. He said that He had. It’s the only way that He can feel her wrapped around Him all at once like that. But what about her asshole? Doesn’t her asshole wrap around Him the same way that her pussy does? Evidently not. He says that her asshole has that tight ring at the entrance that squeezes around Him acting like a vice and it makes it difficult to cum. Ha!! deidre’s ass is so tight that it makes cumming difficult!! she loves it. Here she is worrying that as she gets older her body is becoming less satisfying when really He’s just happy with her all along.

Things are slowly settling back to normal. Not being able to take up the entire bed as she sleeps is hard to get used to and Xavia is pissed because Master is sleeping in her spot, but it’s so good to have Him home again, to hear His voice and to know that He’s right there if deidre wants to touch Him or just kneel quietly at His side.

Sigh. Life is good.

mmmmmmmmmmmm............

She was famished, ravenous. She would try to distract herself but her primary thought was meat. She could almost feel it. A nice big piece of meat. She wanted it so badly. She was throbbing with hunger.

Finally all of the circumstances were just right and she watched as it came closer. It seemed as if it had been forever since the last time she felt full. she was drooling. Finally she felt it against her lips, pressing between, and then sliding in.

Hot wet tight pussy wrapped around cock.

Finally.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you this special news bulletin
………………………………..

Today is happy pussy day!

Yes, finally, after months of waiting for her cunt piercings to heal, deidre will have the wonderful honor of feeling Master’s cock in her cunt fucking her like the little whore she loves to be.

……………………………….

We now return you to your scheduled programming, already in progress…

Gifts, Sex and Route 66

deidre was hoping that the digital camera would be back from Canon so that she could take pics of her presents, but it’s not yet, and deidre looks like a chipmunk in the little movie she made so she isn’t going to post it. she’ll try to re-do it on Monday. Maybe the camera will be back by then and she won’t have to.

she woke up early that morning. she was so excited about the things that were planned, and she was uncharacteristically thirsty. deidre started to get up to go and get some OJ, but Master decided that He would get it for her. Since Master has never offered to get deidre a drink while We/we were at home she figured that something must be up. He brought her a little glass of OJ, and told her to go back to sleep. Some orders, like falling back asleep on her birthday, deidre just can’t seem to follow, but she stayed in bed like a good girl. Within just a few moments deidre could hear the sound of scissors and paper and knew that Master had waited until the last moment to wrap her presents.

deidre stayed in bed only for about 5 minutes after the sounds of wrapping were finished and then she begged Master to please be allowed to get up. There was a stack of prettily wrapped gifts on the glass table in the living room. Master asked her if she’d like to open them right away, and because she’s a dumb-ass sarcastic little bitch she said that she would prefer to wait until noon. He said ok, and deidre was forced to wait.

Finally, after breakfast and coffee, noon rolled around and deidre was allowed to open them. From isabellaval deidre received a copy of both The Trainer and The Academy, which are books 3 and 4 in the Marketplace series.

From slave_karirenee, deidre received a copy of the movie The Piano as well as it's soundtrack. There are a few reasons why it’s one of deidre’s favorite movies. First, it’s just a darn good story. Second, the music is incredible. Third has something to do with Master’s recent trip to Oklahoma and Kansas. While He was away deidre borrowed The Piano from the library and watched it. she was sitting back minding her own business, and missing Master when all of the sudden she saw something familiar on the screen. It was a scene where Harvey Keitel was nude, facing away from the camera. Well, surprisingly, Master and Mr. Keitel have the exact same ass!! It was the perfect thing to see at the time and made her feel quite a bit better.

deidre couldn’t exactly open it, but from slavemasterd she received the final amount so that she could have her first waist-training corset made.

deidre’s bathroom is decorated in Rubber Duckies. It started with just one that she brought with her from California. Her first rubber ducky had been a gift from deidre’s mother when she was pregnant for the first time. For some crazy reason deidre decided that this ducky needed to come with her in the limited number of things that she had room to bring when she moved to Florida. For months He sat forgotten in a box in the closet until one day deidre rediscovered him. From that point forward his new home was on the rim of the tub against the back wall.

A few months later Master and His deidre were in Bed, Bath and Beyond looking for a new shower curtain when We/we stumbled across happy little rubber ducky shower curtain hooks and bought a blue shower curtain to go with it.

When deidre’s 27th birthday rolled around the little money subbie that she had, browsed her wish list on Amazon and decided to send her a ducky bathmat and soap dish.

After the pool was complete, Master and deidre found a giant rubber ducky at the grocery store and bought her so that she could live in the backyard.

Then at Christmas-time deidre’s mom, knowing that the original rubber ducky that she gave deidre started it all, gave her these little duckies that suction cupped onto the shower wall.

At this point deidre figured that she probably had enough rubber duckies. Evidently K, Master’s brother didn’t agree. 4 of the gifts that were on the table the morning of deidre’s birthday were stuffed with rubber duckies. There were Halloween duckies, Pirate Duckies, Birthday Ducks and even little baby glow in the dark Halloween duckies. deidre’s favorite is the one that is dressed up to look like a black cat. It has little black ears and whiskers on either side of his ducky beak. she also has what appears to be a lifetime supply of ducky post it notes and ducky tattoos.

From Master deidre received a few things off of her wish list including a new book of sheet music so that she can play twangy country songs on her guitar, a beautiful silver belly button shield, copies of 2 of her other favorite movies, Memphis Belle and Very Bad Things, and of course deidre’s wonderful trip to BigCatRescue.

After cleaning everything up We/we got ready to go to the cat place. Which was a blast. One day she swears she’ll stop writing about it and boring you all to death. After the big cat place We/we drove over to the Apple Store so that deidre could have a little lesson in iMovie so that she could start making naughty videos for her customers. she learned quite a bit and can’t wait to get some made.

We/we were going to go out to eat in Tampa, but it was getting late and the dogs needed to eat and be let out so We/we drove back home before going out to dinner. We/we had a Calamari appetizer, Cheesy biscuits, Caesar salad, salmon, steamed veggies and drinks served to Us/us by the most wonderfully witty and hot waitress that deidre has had, ever.

Melina was just incredible. She has one of those personalities that makes her seem as if she fears nothing. she joked with us and had quick little smart-ass comments. There was just something about her that deidre can’t describe. Melina seemed perky and fun, but not in a cheerleader kind of way. she was perfectly spunky. Master wasn’t attracted to her at all, but enjoyed watching deidre’s reaction to her. This girl didn’t have a chance to go back last Monday to see her, but will probably do so this coming Monday. There’s just one little problem. deidre’s been speaking with a sweet, very cute potential slave sister and now feels slightly guilty about going out and hitting on another girl. A. says that she has no problem with it, but deidre’s little conscious is giving her trouble. We’ll just have to wait and see what happens on Monday.


Master's trip is going well. He started in Chicago and drove down through Saint Louis, into Kansas, then through Oklahoma and Texas, over to New Mexico, stopped to see bella_de_vil, celticslave, and cowboy_m. Today He was in Arizona. Along the way Master and His brother have been stopping and all kinds of Route 66 restaurants and little touristy things including The Launching Pad Restaurant, the arch in Saint Louis, The town where K was born, Some Cavern in New Mexico (she thinks), Roswell, a giant crater, Phoenix and Sedona in Arizona. They are having a wonderful time, and Master was kind enough to send her a post card or two.

Master will be back in just under 5 days. deidre can’t wait to see Him again. Once He returns deidre’s cunt will finally be fuckable!! she cannot wait to feel that sensation of His cock sliding into her for the first time again and then to feel His cock pounding in and out of her. deidre’s little pussy is just so happy.

deidre’s been neglecting her lj, at least putting something important here. The thing is that she’s lonely without Master. It’s almost as if when He left He took most of deidre with Him and all that’s left is this empty feeling shell. Without Him here there just doesn’t seem to be as much purpose. What’s the point of being a deidre with no Master Lee? It’s like watching your favorite movie, but in black and white and with no sound. It’s not the same. It’s flat. It’s blah. It’s pointless.

deidre's birthday part 1

This is really the second part, but she's writing about it first 'cause she can :)

After getting up and around and opening the presents, deidre got ready to go to Big Cat Rescue. We/we ended up leaving home later than planned and stopped by the library to drop off some things that were due and then began the drive over the bridge to Tampa. At one point a wrong exit was taken, deidre won’t say by whom * Master * and deidre was afraid that We/we would be late. We/we were by only about 5 minutes though and they let us in after signing a special disclosure.

deidre got to see some very beautiful animals and some others that had been treated so badly she was on the verge of tears.

One of the tigers had been kept chained to a wall to guard a stash of drugs and had spent so much time lying on the floor that she was not only underweight from lack of nutrients but had softball sized calluses on her ‘elbows’

One of the panthers had been part of a circus act where he was forced to jump through a ring of fire. Whenever the poor guy refused to do so he was clubbed over the head, which eventually led to horrible tear duct damage and a fear of humans.

Another one of these beautiful creatures was kept in a harness that was never adjusted. Eventually his flesh began to grow over the harness and it had to be cut out with a razor.

Most of the animals at Big Cat Rescue have stories like this. They’ve been neglected and abused, but there are happy stories too. Walking around watching them deidre could see a bit of her own cat’s playfulness in some of the big kitties. They’d role over and show their bellies, or meow in response to the guide’s voice or just do other goofy cat things. We/we got to hear a lion roar too. It was an incredible trumpeting sound, completely unlike the sound that comes from the MGM Lion.

Some of the animals have retired from performing early at this sanctuary so that they can live out their lives happily. As happily as an animal in a cage can be. The enclosures are large and clean, not cement like at a zoo but with vegetation growing inside so that they can live as naturally as possible. Their health and diet are monitored carefully though there is never direct contact unless necessary. The keepers do not get in the enclosures to pet them or to play with them. There are plans in place in the event of an emergency so that the cats can be evacuated quickly and safely.

The staff consists of only 4 paid people. The other 60+ people who are involved are volunteers. It’s obvious from their body language and words that these wonderful people care for the animals quite a bit.

she couldn’t take a camera with her so she has no pictures to share unless she steals them off of the website but there will be plenty of time to take pics later on because deidre will be volunteering there!

On the first Saturday of every month the facility has an orientation. deidre will be attending the one in October. Master wants her to have plenty of time to think it over before she give up half of her time off. Afterward there is an interview process to determine if the potential volunteer is sane enough to work there. Hopefully deidre will pass that test, get her little yellow shirt, and begin spending 8 hours there every other Monday. she will begin on the lowest rung of volunteers with duties that range from weeding, to shit clean up to washing off the slabs that the meat is placed on. deidre will probably never be able to donate more than 16 hours a month of her time to this wonderful place, so chances are slim that she will ever be raised to a level of higher responsibility. she’s okay with that. It’s worth it.

Master asked her on the way home why it was worth it if she is never raised above the lowest level. her answer was simple. Most people have the ability to rise above their circumstances regardless of what they are. There are almost always options for a person to work themselves out of situations. It may be difficult, and at times seem impossible, but it’s doable. These animals don’t have that ability. They’ve either been taken from the wild or were raised in captivity and have become dependant upon humans. They can’t be turned loose. They can’t be expected to survive on their own. People put these animals into these situations. deidre is only one person, but she can make a little bit of a difference in some of these animals’ lives. As silly as it may be deidre hopes that one day perhaps one of them will look at her and know her, to see her without judgment, to consider her a friend or whatever the equivalent is in kitty language.

More about presents and deidre’s very fuckable waitress to come.

Death to Ernesto!

Well, today is deidre’s 28^th birthday. she’ll be spending the day working getting properly used, fucked, spanked and beaten by her wonderful Callers. Tomorrow, as deidre may have mentioned, she is going to Big Cat Rescue on a tour of their facility and to get more information about possibly volunteering there.

Up until this morning deidre was fairly excited about all of this, however, thanks to Ernesto, deidre’s enthusiasm is curbed a little bit. Let deidre show you why….

See that line that represents the path of the hurricane? Follow it up toward Florida’s Gulf Coast. Now, see that cute little purple X? That’s deidre’s house. Oh! Look! That line just happens to be passing right through the X that marks where deidre’s happy little home is. Gee…it says it’ll be there about 8 am Thursday, just in time for Master to have left safely on His trip.

For almost 4 months deidre has been casually bringing up to Master the fact that He is leaving to go on His road trip right smack dab in the middle of the busiest time of the hurricane season. deidre has no experience with hurricanes. There hasn’t been one that directly fell on this area in 60 years. Earthquakes, Blizzards, Fires…she can handle that. she’s been in freezing weather without electricity or running water for days. she felt the Loma Prieta earthquake in 1989 and has felt several smaller ones through the years.

A hurricane though, that’s a different matter. She’s not concerned with the high winds. Master’s home is concrete block. It’s not likely to be blown over. The rain on it’s own isn’t a big deal either, unless you consider the pool. While there’s power though draining the pool isn’t a problem. It’s the storm surge that is most troubling. According to deidre’s research if a category 4 hurricane hits just north of us, there will be approx. 14 feet of storm surge. That’s 14 feet of extra water washing up onto the shore and eventually through the streets to Master’s home.

deidre’s lucky though. she has several different places she can go to get out of the way. she, the cats, dogs and some emergency supplies can hop into the SUV and drive 2 hours to Orlando to stay with family, or drive 9 hours up to Atlanta to stay at Master’s other house. The emergency supplies, and important paperwork are all packed. The SUV will be full of gas, and if for some reason she can’t get gas somewhere along the way, a full tank will take her as far as the Georgia border. deidre will have Master’s cell phone which is loaded with emergency numbers. she’ll have cash in case the power’s out and she can’t use the credit card. Everything is all set and prepared.

So why is she so scared?

In the end, the hurricane will probably miss us, there will be no storm surge, and no reason to pack up and go. If it keeps heading right toward us then Master’s flight out of Tampa on Wednesday will be delayed and deidre can sit back and just let Him take control.

Yeah, let’s just think positively. The damn thing will miraculously die out there in the gulf, the skies will be blue, the waters calm and all will be right with the world.

Regret

celticslave said "You have spoken of your past and how you wouldn’t change any of it. Life is not worth living if you have regrets however When was the defining moment for you on realizing that?"

"If Only. Those must be the two saddest words in the world" - Mercedes Lackey

deidre believes that it was something that happened gradually. During the first day of deidre’s 7th grade English Literature class the teacher decided to do something a little different. She had us all turn our desks away from the black board and toward the other side of the room where a television was. She popped in a tape, dimmed the lights, hit play on the remote and we were transported in the cinematic reality that is "Dead Poet’s Society"

The teacher’s point was to introduce us to Walt Whitman’s "O Captain My Captain" but the movie had a far great impact on deidre than the teacher anticipated. Not only did it inspire deidre to become an English teacher, (a dream she held onto as long as possible, but not one that worked with her marriage) but for the first time she heard the phrase "carpe diem". deidre began to think about what that meant. Seize the day. Time is short. Don’t put off the things that are important. Don’t waste time with insincerity or regret.

deidre remembers when it really hit her, and she understood everything that those 2 little words meant. she was in high school, and actually still has the piece of paper on which she wrote, "Never be ashamed of doing something you wanted to do - only be ashamed of not doing something you wanted to do." Do the things you want, do them all, savor life, become fulfilled and regret nothing. If you think you might regret passing up the chance to do something seize that chance, and ride that ride.

Of course, there are always consequences, and those consequences have evolved into what the lack of regret is really focused on. From any situation sift out the good and leave the bad behind. deidre wasn’t able to truly apply this until after her attempted suicide. As she has written, it was a life changing experience. It emphasized how precious every moment really is. deidre’s "no regrets" self policy was enforced once again after her rape. Yes, a rape is a horrible experience, but it is also an experience that changed deidre once again. she grew up a lot that night, took that growth as positive and left the rest behind her.

It isn’t just the big things that shape us. Everything has an effect, even those things that we cannot see. Past events silently mold each and every one of us into the person we are at present. It is because of that, because of the person that deidre has become, that deidre does not regret anything thing, not the rape, not the attempted suicide, not choosing to drink hot cocoa instead of coffee on some winter’s day. To regret any one of those things is to ultimately regret the person that deidre is, to wish that she was different. And honestly, deidre likes the person she has grown into.

Master's home...

....at least for a few days. His trip home started with a call from His brother who had run out of gas on his way to work. Master, hero that He is, saved the day by taking a few gallons of gas to His brother and then followed him the rest of the way to His office before setting out on the trip.

Just before the Georgia border Master pulled into a gas station to fill up and realized that one of the tires on the car was flat. He slowly drove it over to the air/water machine and tried to fill it up but the air was coming out just as fast as it was going in. Evidently there was a problem with the valve stem. Luckily there was a tire store within a few miles and they were able to fix it and get Master back on the road quickly.

Off to one side of the road flies a huge Confederate Flag. Master has been meaning to stop and find out who is responsible for flying it for years, and finally decided that this time, since there was no slave, no dogs and no cats, He would. There was no direct road to the flag, and no buildings near, so Master stopped at the closest thing, which was the state farmer’s market. A very helpful woman at the farmer’s market headquarters was able to give Master some contact info.

Master basically wanted to thank them for flying the flag and remembering all of the brave Confederate solders who fought for what they believed in, fought for their own ideas, their lands, their homes. After speaking with the state representative it looks like Master may be interested in joining.

Now that deidre thinks about it, it isn’t something that is celebrated often. You hear of Veterans of W.W.I, W.W.II, Korea, Vietnam, and the Gulf War, but deidre has not heard a single time anyone celebrating those of the Confederate Army. Is that because they didn’t win? Weren’t they fighting for what they believed in just as much as those in the revolutionary war? They didn’t believe in their cause any less than anyone else who fights on their home turf. Perhaps deidre’s exposure is limited because she wasn’t born and raised in the south, and only has lived here for less than 3 years.

Anyway, that’s not the point of this entry. Finally Master made it home to His naked bowing slave right where deidre happens to feel He should ALWAYS be.

On Monday deidre will be going to Big Cat Rescue and she cannot wait! she is so incredibly excited!! she hopes that the weekend just flies by and Monday comes before she knows it. The only negative at the point is that Master’s digital camera is off in Canon’s fix-it-land and deidre highly doubts that it will arrive tomorrow so that she can take it with her. Master says that we can always buy some disposable cameras, but that’s just not the same. deidre can take thousands of pics with the digi-cam and easily get rid of any she doesn’t like.

deidre finally put up her reading list, and will be keeping it updated as much as possible. she’s slowly posting some of her poetry and prose as well. Eventually she plans to have it all here, even the horrible stuff. Feel free to comment if you like, but please try to be nice. If you don’t like it, just refrain from saying anything rude. Constructive criticism is always welcome. Just remember that these are little pieces that are taken from deidre’s heart and her soul, that they are not just words written in haste, but rather expressions of intense emotion.

Island Fun

celticslave said "You have 48 hours on an island in the middle of the ocean. You are allowed to take 5 people with you. You are allowed to take 5 toys with you for play. Who would you take and what would happen with the six of you while on the island?"

Since you didn’t specify which island deidre is going to choose the one that Johnny Depp owns, while he’s there :) Since he’s already there he doesn’t exactly count as one of the 5 that deidre brings with her.

deidre’s thought about this a lot. One would think she would chose something “lifestylish” to do, but if she only has the one opportunity, and there are no conditions set other than those in the question itself deidre would bring with her 1)Master 2)A, deidre’s step daughter 3)J, deidre’s 13 year old sister 4) Her grandmother on her mother’s side 5) her grandmother on her father’s side.

Both of deidre’s grandmothers are dead, but neither of them had the chance to meet Master. Gramma S died when deidre was 8. deidre would love for not only to meet Master, but also to see the woman that her granddaughter has grown into. Gramma B died just a few years ago, but at the time deidre was miserably married to her ex husband still.

The reason for bringing A should be obvious. Not a day goes by when deidre doesn’t think of her. A is the only daughter that deidre will ever have. This girl raised her from the time she was 2 until she was 9 years old. deidre taught her to read, how to do her hair, took her to kindergarten for the first time and to school every day that she went after that. deidre was there when her eyes lit up at Christmas and spend hours the day before each birthday making elaborate cakes for A. deidre was there when she woke up in the middle of the night scared, when she scraped her knee or fell off of the horse. If deidre could have 2 more days with her telling her how much deidre loves her and that it wasn’t this girl’s decision to cease contact deidre would be happy. Even if it meant that deidre would never again hear from her or see her.

J is a beautiful young girl but because of certain events in her life has low self-esteem. She’s at that phase where girls are unsure of themselves, she’s changing, growing, becoming a woman. Mom is around much, deidre can’t be because she lives 2500 miles away, but for just 2 days deidre would like to tell J how special she is, how loved and beautiful she is.

deidre would bring with her a video camera, extra batteries, a stash of cameras, a stack of paper and some pens. Each person would have a camera so that they could take pics whenever they wanted of whomever they wanted. The video camera would be running constantly while the 6 (7 if Johnny joined in) interacted. Gramma S would have a both kids in her lap finding a way to make them laugh and to play with them even without toys. Gramma B would be sitting next to Master asking Him all kinds of questions that one would never expect to hear from a 90 year old woman. If Master answered one thing wrong Gramma B would probably kick His ass. deidre would be sitting between both of her grandmothers taking down their stories, recipes etc. All of the things that deidre heard over and over for years but never thought to retain. Death isn’t something one usually thinks about with people like grandmothers until it happens.

At night we’d sit around the campfire reminiscing, laughing, crying until things settled down and we’d stare up into the stars as we drift off to sleep.

Saying goodbye would be hard. deidre can imagine her grandmothers pulling her aside one at a time to tell her how proud of her they are, and how much the like Master. Asking one last time if deidre is sure that she is happy. Perhaps even telling her that all of those years they were looking down upon her and they will continue to do so when they go back.

It would be hard to let A go, and to know that deidre would probably never see her again, but now she would have all new memories to hold onto. We’d have 2 precious days that were plucked out of time where nothing existed but us and we could just enjoy each other.

It’d be hard to say goodbye to J too, but deidre knows we will see each other and talk with each other again. Even though there are so many miles between us, J is just a phone call away.